The Eagles’ fans are notorious for their ups and downs regarding how the team is doing during the season and at the games themselves. A few bad tackles in a game can bring out the boo birds. It is exciting to see how the Eagles Nation is so ready for the Super Bowl to occur! All of us want the Birds to be victorious but let me share some theories to keep in mind if we come up short.
We should feel relieved to keep in mind the Hedonic Treadmill which is the idea that people return to a stable level of happiness after experiencing happy or sad events. There is a baseline so that Jalen Hurts’ excitement after our victory or sadness if we lose will return to his baseline of happiness in a short period of time. This is true of our normal life as well. There was a study done of Joe Flacco and a woman who was paralyzed after an automobile accident. People were surprised that when Flacco received one of the highest contracts for a quarterback, he went out to lunch after the signing not at the Capital Grill, but at McDonalds. After six months, the quarterback and accident victim were interviewed. They had the same life satisfaction level as they did six months before the signing and the accident. This was true of most people in the study.
Then we have what many regard as the Rolling Stones greatest song, “I Can’t Get No Satisfaction.” Our satisfaction is key. We are constantly seeking satisfaction along the happiness spectrum no matter who you are. If you base your self-worth on success, you will go from victory to victory to avoid feeling awful.
Satisfaction is continually getting what you want. This is part of human nature for people who are “hard chargers”, and I am one of them. We go from one success to another because failure is always hiding behind our door to get in the way of what we want.
The EA community included very successful people, some of whom got everything they wanted in life, and usually had little experience of not getting what they desired. They were difficult to deal with if they felt dissatisfied with their interaction with me wasn’t what they wanted to hear. When they realized that I was just like them in standing my ground, they dropped the bluster. My family often comments that I love conflict. For better or worse, I was raised that way in working class culture.
But satisfaction has an underbelly of worshipping material things where one’s identity and self-esteem and self-worth are too much a part of the picture. This leads to wanting more and more. Kansas City is a bit like this. They want a three peat. It’s normal. The key is knowing how to be a good winner and a good loser.
But here is something important for those of us in the Eagles Nation to remember when that last whistle blows. Satisfaction doesn’t last after a victory because satisfaction is fleeting.
Part of my repertoire in counseling is positive psychology. During the Covid Pandemic, Vicki and I took an online class through Yale on Positive Psychology called “Well Being.” It was the highest subscribed course at Yale. I knew a good bit about positive psychology as the founder of the discipline was one of my mentors, but I was introduced to something new in the course, the concept of “Savoring”. Most of us think of savoring food as that is usually where we associate the word. But it is true in life experiences as well.
Satisfaction can be savored in the same way food is savored. This is what I hope will be the case for the Eagles Nation at the end of the game. What most people don’t realize is that the first bite of ice cream is what you taste. The rest of the ice cream is embellishment of that first taste. Since I am someone who eats to live, I am not like those that live to eat. However, I am now savoring food and enjoying it more. This past weekend we had friends to lunch, and I savored our time together. They stayed most of the afternoon to just talk. My appreciation for our time together stayed with me throughout the weekend.
I discovered how you can be aware of savoring with a simple glimpse of an experience. I met Dr. Csikszentmihalyi (pronounced Sick-Mick- Hile), a Professor at the University of Chicago, at a conference at Princeton for thought leaders regarding Positive Psychology. He identified the concept of “flow” which is another word for “savoring.” There are times when our time with a person or group seems to drag on like crawling through a desert. Compare that to savoring or flow when you are so immersed in the experience that time flies by. That experience seems to be very long because it stays with you. That is savoring.
“Fly Eagles fly
On the road to victory…
E-A-G-L-E-L-S
Eagles!”
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